When asked to define "great" he said, "I want to write stuff that the whole world will read,
stuff that people will react to on a truly emotional level, stuff that will make them scream,
cry, howl in pain and anger!"
He now works for Microsoft, writing error messages
"Smile you make and hello say to wanted just I that out find you when irritating very it
find will you."
Confused !!! read it backwards.
Face of Man after Engagement - Superman.
Face of Man after Marriage - Gentlerman.
Face of Man after 10 Years of Marriage - Watchman.
Face of Man after 20 Years of Marriage - Doberman!!
Wife: If I die what will you DO?
Husband: I may also DIE.
Wife: Why?
Husband: Sometimes too much of HAPPINESS can also KILL.
"I hear that you drop some money in Stocks. Were you a bull or a bear?" "Neither, just a plain simple ass."
A lady delivered twins. Suprisingly one is a boy and another is a dog how it is possible? Bcoz her husband is HUTCH DEALER.... wherever u go out network follows
Dream makes al things possible, Hope makes al things work, luv makes al thigs beutifl, smile makes al d abv so always BRUSH UR TEETH...!
Husband: Today is sunday & I have to enjoy it. So i bought 3 movie tickets. Wife: why three? Husband: 4 u and ur parents.
A police recruit was asked during exam, "What would u do if u had to arrest ur own mother?" He said, "Call for backup."
A baby monkey asks his father, Father why r we so ugly? The father says to him, don't stress my son u should see the one who is reading this!!
Her Job & My Job Her Job is to Bitch! Mine is to give her a Reason!
What do u call a woman in heaven? An Angel. A crowd of woman in heaven? A host of Angels. And all woman in heaven? PEACE ON EARTH!
Teacher: What should be in a book to make it a bestseller? Tommy: A girl on the cover and no cover on the girl.
Consequences of American life style:
The wife rushed into house screaming 2 her husband, Darling, Come quick! Ur kids n my kids r beating our kids
Their are moments in life when you really miss someone. And you wish you could just pluck them from your dreams..
Aim for the stars. But first, aim for their bodyguards.
Woman: The most efficient money reducing agent known to man-kind!
Any woman that thinks the way to a mans heart is through his stomach is aiming just a little too high.
How do you save a man from drowning? Take yer foot of his head.
What did the drummer get on his IQ test? Drool...
I'd explain it to you, but your brain would explode.
